Funny incidents-I

I was in kanpur for Inter iit sports meet last December(2009).
Whenever I travel to a new place, a few episodes always occur which stay etched in my mind even though they might be unimportant, most of them being related to my height.


Being part of a basketball team, you expect us to have tall players.
One such guy was 6"6 ,(lets call him 'A')
In a normal frame of reference, you would classify him as tall.
so here's what happened...
this guy 'A', enters a canteen in iit kanpur.
(both him and me where looked at by everybody as expected.)
the canteen-wala tells his assistant:
" arre bhai, ye itna lamba khamba kahaan se aa gaya?"
On seeing me enter the canteen later on, the assistant told-(Mr.B luckily managed to hear this to narrate this incident to me later on)
" ab dekhiye ji , iska bada bhai abhi aayega. yeh to sirf uske pair(leg) ke barabar hain!"


P.S- Mr. A is used to gathering a lot of attention wherever he goes...
but, in his own words, I seem to have stolen his thunder!
He's beginning to feel "woefully" short!

P.P.S- All you barely 6 footers out there, please stop calling yourself Tall!People will then run out of adjectives to describe me :D



"

Return of the king...

Well, its been a long time since I posted (or for that matter,even visited) this page..
Life is as monotonous as it can be barring a few exceptions.
Trying to cook up stories just to post them here is not my thing, so I decided to lay low for a while.
But, what the heck , my so called monotonous life is not what you would classify as ordinary.

It might just be worth posting about a few incidents which happened over the last few weeks/months.After all, nobody has their pics being taken randomly or "autographs" being asked for at almost every turn in the outside world!



Here's hoping for a new and a better beginning..
(also wishing you people a very happy and prosperous new year ahead..may it be filled with joy,happiness and "Tall stories" :P )

Going green!

Was green with envy yesterday when i realised that my friend's college is reopening only during the 3rd week of august!
Poor me, have to start suffering two weeks before him!
So,I have done my bit for the planet!
Have you?

go green, save the planet!
(look, even the arrow has turned green, in a bid to save our planet!)


P.S- On a serious note, i've really started conserving Water, Electricity,BLAH,BLAh,etc...
try to contribute in your own way by doing so too!
after all, facebook has told me that i will die due to political assasination!

how will i die?
Political Assassination

Your obsession with power will eventually be the end of you when you're shot down by members of your own cabinet. Rough way to go. We recommend writing up a good will, and shredding any documents that might paint you as a shady character. The last thing you need is your political legacy being destroyed when greedy relatives ransacking your mansion discover that you plagiarized your book report in fourth grade.

i dont want climate change to prove the prophecy wrong by drowning me in the waters of the ever rising oceans!
so guys, "meri aur facebook ki izzat bachao"(protect facebook and my honour) and do ur bit atleast so that i may die a honourable death as predicted by facebook!

Tagged....a sad day in my life!!

this is a supposedly popular tag doin the rounds....hopefully it "leaves " me soon!
all thanks to Mr _____


Q: How much cash do you have in your wallet right now?

A: at this point of time,my wallet is not with me.
but,lemme check....i've got 476 Rs....

Q: What’s a word that rhymes with DOOR?

A:BOAR,SOAR,POUR,etc...
sentence with these words-the BOAR SOARED after it POURED out its inner contents!!:P
makes no sense at all1

Q: Who is the 4th person on your missed call list on your cell phone?

A: a CALL Centre no...

Q: What is your favorite ring tone on your phone?

A: im a simple guy...just a high frequency buzzer for me!really hurts people's ears if ur not accustomed to it..
Q: What are you wearing right now?

A: clothes and some food stuck on it!

Q: Do you label yourself?

A: no,im not a goat..

Q: Name the brand of the shoes you’re currently own?

A: NIKE,REEBOK and an unbranded one...

Q: Bright or Dark Room?
A: Bright always..they should notice me...for that they need light!

Q: What do you think about the person who took this survey before you?
A: the same that he thinks of himself,i.e, that he's shorter than me..

Q: What does your watch look like?

A: looks like my face when light falls on it and i see my reflection.

Q: What were you doing at midnight last night?

A: played FIFA, put peace, chatted, laughed....did not sleep though!

Q: What did your last text message you received on your cell say?

A:VM-TONES
PLZ CALL 50777 FOR FREE CALLERTUNES!

Q: What’s a word that you say a lot?

A: i actually think that i use the the word actually too much.
Q: Who told you he/she loved you last? (Please exclude spouse, family, and children)

A: My friend,when i helped him out with his comp problem!

Q: Last furry thing you touched?

A: my hair!

Q: Favorite age you have been so far?

A: Kaliyug!!

Q: What was the last thing you said to someone?

A: yeah!

Q: The last song you listened to?

A:some arbit song which was played when i tried to connect to a new internet radio channel..seemed to be latin.
Q: Where did you live in 1987?

A: i was homeless...i was'nt born thennni did'nt have a home!! :(

Q: Are you jealous of anyone?

A: Yes,myself

Q: Is anyone jealous of you?
A: wait a min.,..let me confirm..
yes,atleast 1 person is!

Q: Name three things that you have on you at all times?

A: My eyes, my nose and my clothes(mouth and ears are optional)

Q: What’s your favorite town/city?

A: the garden city BANGALORE!

Q: When was the last time you wrote a letter to someone on paper and mailed it?

A: i posted a letter to the company i had to go to for an internship even though i had'nt written it!

Q: Can you change the oil on a car?

A: dont think so...but,i can change a car on oil!

Q: Your first love/big crush: what is the last thing you heard about him/her?

A: that she has'nt heard about me!

Q: Does anything hurt on your body right now?

A: Yes… My heart...after the last question..

Q: What is your current desktop picture?

A: a picture of the cross section of a tree..

Q: Have you been burnt by love?

A: not yet....closest was when i was burnt by boiling water!

messages and codes as useless as me!

these are some classic ones which i happened to go through when i was browsing:- enjoy...

1. Keyboard error (press F1 to resume)
2. Error: this can't happen!
   

3. if ($x == 1) {
      # do something
   } elsif ($x == 2) {
      # do something else
   } else {
      confess "should't be here!"
   }

4. OK
5. In Linux, in single-user mode, the login system isn't working. Therefore, when you try to use logout or exit, you get:

   You don't exist.  Go Away.

6. There is a firewall application that reports errors and access violations when attempting to connect to various resources. If it cannot even identify the resource in question, it simply spits out ...

   "FooFar detected access violation error while trying to access the unknown."

7. in a Win32 app report
   

   BLAHBLAHBLAHBLAHBLAHBLAHBLAHBLAHBLAHBLAH BLAHBLAHBLAHBLAHBLAHBLAHBLAHBLAHBLAHBLAH

8. in an administration shell. The prompt looked like a normal unix prompt so people invariably ended up typing 'ls' in it. To which it would reply, "You're not in unix any more Toto."
9. Fatal error, unable to continue: Life is good
10. Windows classics:

    "Error: The operation completed successfully."
    "Fatal error code 0: No error."

birth control-amazing solution.

i just could'nt control myself from putting this up....
our honorable health min has come up with a novel method for birth control in rural areas.
his suggestions:-
1)marry after the age of 25(this one is acceptable)
2)supply continous electricity to villages so that people can watch TV!!!!
yes, thats true!!
he believes that if people watch TV till late in the night,they'll get too tired and forget about other "activities"..like giving birth to children!!!
SO INGENIOUS!!
KUDOS to the health minister...
instead of believing in"spare the rod and spoil the child"; he believes in
"don't spare the TV and STOP the child"!!


“If there is electricity in every village then people will watch TV till late night and then fall asleep. They won't get a chance to produce children. When there is no electricity there is nothing else to do but produce babies,” said Azad at a population control conference.